I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
handjob tips. give me some.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
