We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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