It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
