What a fucking waste of an outfit
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
