that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
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