Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
