Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
