Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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