He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
