You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
false alarm. still invincible.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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