What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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