How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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