I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
