it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
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