i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Randomize