Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
