Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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