So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
that's an acceptable place to lick
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
