we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Randomize
