Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
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