I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
