You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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