handjob tips. give me some.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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