look no pants
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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