id be glad to
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
