You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
