Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
