Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
