In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize