You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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