is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
then he tried to convert me to islam
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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