Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
