I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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