i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize