Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
