oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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