Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
