Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
