i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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