I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
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