I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
the liver wants what the liver wants
is that a dick in a sweater?
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
