I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
