Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall

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(250): View more from British Columbia

Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...

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(810): View more from Michigan

I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same

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(708): View more from Illinois

We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance

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(604): View more from British Columbia

So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.

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(541): View more from Oregon

Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...

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(313): View more from Michigan

my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening

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