Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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