you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Randomize
