Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
