Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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