Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize