the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
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