Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
She needs sedatives and a leash
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
