i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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